My Secondhand Year

Throughout 2023 “my secondhand year,” I kept a running document of “MSY blog post ideas,” most of which I fleshed out into actual posts and published. But a couple never made it past the idea stage — one of which said simply, “What’s my why?” I guess I never wrote that post because that question was essentially answered in several of my other posts.

In the very first sentence of my first post back in January 2023, I wrote that my main reasons for wanting to quit shopping had to do with “money, time, personal values, and an overcrowded closet.” That’s kind of vague but does seem to cover it. However, now looking back, I think my real “why” is to alleviate stress — the anxiousness that comes with making shopping decisions, the feeling of overwhelm that comes with a closet packed with clothes that don’t flatter me or fit my life, and the hassle of making returns or trying to sell stuff I bought and regret. Life is honestly so much easier for me when there are no decisions to make and no extra errands or projects related to shopping mistakes.

I think I did it. The year is over; the world of retail is again available to me — and I’m not dying to shop. I find myself hesitant to pull the trigger, even with all the sales going on. And not just hesitant to check out — I’m actually hesitant to even look. After a year of actively avoiding shopping, the thought of it now just makes me weary, and scrolling makes me slightly queasy.

In the interest of full disclosure, I should share what I did buy last year. Thankfully it’s a short list: Aside from the sun hat I bought on the beach in Mexico and the dress I bought for my daughter’s graduation (purchased with a gift card), the new things I purchased were a suitcase that I really needed and a pair of warm fleece pants for walking the dog in the winter. Both were on Black Friday sales, and both were purchased with a lot of careful consideration and determined to be things I actually needed. And, by the way, both are awesome and will be used/worn for a long time to come. I also bought a pair of sandals while on a quick getaway with my daughter before she went to college; this falls under the category of “purchases made in local shops on vacation are OK.” Kind of. And, I almost forgot I snuck into a popup cashmere sale with a friend and bought a sweater — no excuses for that (not even I could claim to “need” a new cashmere sweater) other than it’s become a little tradition with us and it was a great deal.

As for secondhand purchases, this is where I kind of overdid it, and this is probably not a complete list: I bought a rain jacket for my April trip to New York (which ended up being a lifesaver since it poured almost the entire time we were there), a pair of old Levi’s 501s (re-sold because they didn’t fit), a pair of Bevy Flog pants (IYKYK), a beautiful black wool skirt that I wore on Christmas eve, and a pair of tall boots from The Real Real. And my gorgeous snow boots, which, although found in a secondhand boutique, I’m pretty sure were new. Oh, and a friend hosted a party where a friend of hers was selling used designer handbags. I almost escaped without buying a bag, but alas the temptation was too great. I rationalized the purchase because it was secondhand — and literally the perfect bag for my life; I use it every day.

When my family asked me what I wanted for Christmas, I think they suspected I would have a long and very specific list; I had, after all, been keeping a “to buy in 2024” list on my computer. But I looked back over that list and realized I didn’t really need, or even actually want, any of it. So, I told them to surprise me, and, aside from new ski boots from my husband that I helped pick out (a definite “need” — my old boots were from 2007), they did. I got a perfect leather tote that will last a lifetime, a huge fuzzy blanket scarf, a gorgeous green woven purse, a cookbook that looks amazing, a badass cowboy hat, and the Jane Austen tarot deck I’d almost purchased several times (yes, it’s for real and yes it’s very awesome; the tagline is “A Truth Universally Acknowledged”). How fun is that?

So, am I cured? Am I now a reformed former shopper? I don’t think I would go that far, but I would say I’ve definitely changed my ways. I am just way more circumspect now about what I buy. And I do feel lighter. My closet is still an overcrowded hellscape, but at least I haven’t added (mush) to the mess.

One of the great things about not buying much is having no regrets, and I don’t.

Going forward, my next step is to purge. My goal for 2023 was to curtail my intake; for 2024, it’s to get serious about cleaning out and KonMari-ing my closet. I long for space between hangers and an uncluttered floor, but I know that as difficult it was for me to forego buying, it will be much harder for me to get rid of what I have. I may post here and there if I have any revelations that seem worth sharing. (One thing that’s been interesting to me is what clothing items I actually wear. It became really clear early on in this process that I only wear a fraction of what I own, and that didn’t change when I couldn’t buy anything new. If anyone would want to know that, please let me know in the comments and I’ll share the list — you know, so you can buy some new stuff 🙂

Thank you all for following along this year and for your encouragement.